~by Sean Paul Kelley
Good heavens, the economic bad news is piling up like a bad car wreck. So, let’s do some serious rubbernecking, folks, because there is a lot of fucked up shit to watch. Just don’t step in it, okay?
We begin with widepsread reports of large institutional investors (hedge funds, investment banks, boutique investment firms) selling off services stocks like leisure, luxury, hotels, and some retail outlets, like Home Depot. That’s a lot of cash leaving equities. But for what safe harbor? It certainly isn’t private credit, like Blackrock which lost 100 percent on one investment. UBS also lost 100 percent on another private credit deal. Now, Blackrock lost $150 million on the deal, which, for Blackrock, is naught but a silly little rounding error, but as they say, $150 million here, a $150 million there and pretty soon you’re talking real money. That cash won’t go into US treasuries, that’s for damn sure. Seriously, who’d invest in US dollars? I wouldn’t fuck a US treasury with Magic Johnson’s dick.
Yeah, I said it. It needed to be said.
Want news even more ominous: JP Morgan Chase, Goldman Sachs and my alma mater (for full disclosure) Morgan Stanley were the lead underwriters of a $1 billion increase in AI firm Coreweave’s $2.5 billion revolving credit facility. The term sheet expands the maturity date from 2028 to 2029. Just a year? Did they attempt any due dililgence on Coreweave’s burn rate? It’s gotta be a fuckton fast — see, Americans can do metrics. FTW!
But really, you know that kind of high-tech equipment becomes obsolete and depreciates faster than that loan reaches maturity. There is zero, zilch, nada, niente, nyet, nein, no way Coreweave’s earning increases that rapidly. To quote Yoda, “Coreweave, Apple certainly not you are.”
Apple’s so profitable it prints money.
I mean, seriosuly, Christ on a popsicle stick: Where’s the due diligence? Do investment firms even have compliance departments any more? Where are the regulators?
Yeah, yeah, I know, I know.
But it gets worse: On Nov. 4, Meta agreed to an off-balance sheet $27 billion loan (also known as a Special Purpose Entity, henceforth SPE) from Blue Owl Capital (OBCD). This is financial shenanigans and identical to the accounting legerdemain that led to Enron’s ruin. Pay attention, people. This is getting ugly. Enron butt-hurt ugly is how bad this is starting to look. Let me break this down for you, in case you forgot. An SPE is off-balance sheet. That means the company is under no obligation to report it on its SEC required filings. Get it now? Investors have absolutely no way of knowing how much off-balance sheet debt a particular company has. SPEs = bad juju.
To wit: Oracle has a debt-to-equity ratio approaching 500 percent, and that’s just what’s on the their balance sheet. Has Oracle borrowed any money where the debt is accounted for in an SPE?
Guess what, folks? There is literally no way to know if Oracle has any SPE loans outstanding.
My bet: They do.
Speaking of shit credit, or is it credit shit?
Whatever. Moving on.
JP Morgan notes AI-linked debt now accounts for 14 percent of its investment grade corporate index (CGI IG), surpassing US commercial banks as the dominant sector. Who the fuck knew US commercial banks have turned into stingy mozafukas? Can haz dolerz, puleeze?
“What does it mean?” you query, doing your best to ignore my increasingly insulting expletives.

“I know I’m right about the housing market,” he says, repeating it like a mantra.
Well, it means that not only are AI firms taking on loads of traditionally-financed debt, they are also bulking up with the anabolic steroid equivalent of debt: unknowable and NON-REPORTABLE SPE debt. They pump this iron to finance AI hyper-scaling. No wonder the main character of the (mostly) true movie, The Big Short, Michael Burry, is closing his fund. Dude shorted Palantir and Nvidia and got caught with his pants down. Sadly, Burry forgot John Maynard Keynes keen paroemia (from the ancient Greek, meaning maxim or proverb) from when he lost all his money in the 1929 crash: “Markets can remain irrational longer than you can remain solvent.”
Also: Beware neologisms created on Wall Street. Today’s new phrase is “data center credit.” Sounds positive, aye? It ain’t. It’s a bullshit phrase referring to debt financed for the AI sector by private credit shops. Tons and tons of bullshit, yes?

“Ha-ha,” he said. “Stupid, stupid!”
There is also news that insurers are placing more than 50 percent of the assets needed to guarantee/backstop annuities and life insurance policies into private credit shops. This is a terrible idea. Annuities are insurance policies designed to pay out in the event you live too long. Life insurance is, well, insurance against not living long enough. This is stupid. Epic stupid and civilization-ending risky. It’s like giving the nuclear football to Beevis and Butthead stupid.
Oil prices are soft/down to flat. Texas rig counts are down again this month (rig counts are considered a leading economic indicator).
Now to news out of the Big Apple tonight, that absolutely shrivels me testes. Say it with me like a pirate! As my little sister used to say to me, “You are so not fun.”
Anywho: The head of the NY Fed convened an emergency meeting of bank heads to discuss one of the Fed’s key lending facilities. I’m almost certain this is in response to the rising private credit losses, and how they resemble Bear Stearns blowing up two subprime hedge-funds in 2007, the precise moment the 2008 financial crisis began.
Most distressing is today’s down volume high. It’s one like we’ve never seen before. The downward volume and amount of stocks closing on the downside blew out a 35 year high. This screams louder than Rob Halford singing “Victim of Changes” live at the US Festival in 1983. It’s also an indicator of deeper stresses affecting equity markets.
This is what we now call, in the algorithm-trade dominated age, a mechanical sell-off. All of Wall Street’s proprietary algorithms saw red and initiated the mother of all sell offs. This already spectacularly, terrifyingly narrow advance is getting narrower, and it is growing more brittle by the day. Why worry? Are markets worried about private credit shops lending to off-balance sheet AI SPEs? Is liquidity getting tighter? Risk limits getting ripped to shreds? Doesn’t really matter. It’s a big signal that should overpower the noise. But it won’t.
Wall Street’s useful idiots will do their duty and cheer until the real crisis begins to unravel. Sooner now, than later. You can bank on that. Just don’t do it in US dollars. That would be dumb. Epic-like dumb.
Piling the shit higher and higher: Sallie Mae off-loaded $6bn worth of student loans to KKR recently. How better to clean up a balance sheet than selling debt with a 10 percent non-performing rate? Makes sense to me, but I’m just some guy in pajamas.
More great economic news: Large corporate bankruptcy filings, as of mid-November, rise to a 15 year high. That’s higher than the COVID-19 crisis. To date, 655 public companies have filed for bankruptcy. Good times, aye?
Finally, a positive thought, in a manner of speaking. The only thing the equity markets have going in their favor right now is this: the almost impossible to prevent or deny Christmas rally. It’s damn near as reliable as the Monsoons.
So, if the econ shit does hit the fan, it’ll happen after January 1.
While reading deeper, I found something much more important: a lot of these new humanoid startups aren’t building from scratch. Instead, they’re standing on the Unitree G1 frame and layering their own proprietary AI on top. That means Unitree has quietly become the default hardware platform for China’s humanoid boom — like the Android of robot bodies.
A few examples:
1. A-Bots Robotics (Shenzhen, 2024)
• Focus: precision assembly, modular SDK
• AI layer: Baidu Ernie-ViLM for object manipulation
• Notes: 150+ units in Foxconn trials; ~$22k package; tuned for fragile electronics
2. HPDrones Tech (Guangzhou, 2023)
• Focus: warehouse logistics + drone hand-off automation
• AI layer: proprietary SLAM + multi-floor routing
• Notes: partnered with Unitree; 500-unit rollout for e-commerce warehouses in Q1 2026
3. LeRobot Labs (Beijing, 2024)
• Focus: open-source robotics + reinforcement learning
• AI layer: embodied datasets, tool-use improvisation
• Notes: hacked 20+ G1s for universities; GitHub repo exploded; expanding to eldercare
4. Weston Intelligence (Hangzhou, 2023)
• Focus: healthcare — vitals scanning, bedside conversations
• AI layer: Tencent Hunyuan conversational model
• Notes: deployed in Shanghai hospitals; sub-$20k price; measurable patient-compliance benefits
5. DexAI Dynamics (Shenzhen, 2024)
• Focus: dexterity — folding fabric, micro-adjustments, teleop self-supervision
• Notes: $80M raised; 100 units deployed in garment factories; arguably the best hands in China now
And then there’s MindOn — the one that caught my eye earlier — using the G1 frame to build a full butler/housekeeping robot (“MindOne”). One of their engineers even said they eventually want their own frame, but that’s the point: everyone is starting on Unitree first.
Unitree has locked down the humanoid robot ecosystem
All these startups — even if they eventually design their own skeletons — are still tying their early models to:
• Unitree’s frames
• Unitree’s actuator supply chain
• Unitree’s low-cost motor ecosystem
• Unitree’s software layer and APIs
Once you build your first few generations on someone else’s chassis + firmware, you’re effectively locked into their ecosystem. Switching costs explode. You’d have to rewrite half your AI stack.
So Unitree has already achieved what Western robotics companies wish they could do:
Become the default hardware substrate for an entire national robotics industry.
This is exactly how China overtook the West in EVs — standardized hardware, cheap mass manufacturing, and dozens of startups building on top of the same base.
Unitree is still a private company.
Given everything above, the most obvious question becomes: When does Unitree IPO?
On 15–16 November 2025 (literally this weekend), Unitree completed its pre-IPO regulatory tutoring with CITIC Securities — an unusually fast four-month process that normally takes 6–12 months.
The company publicly stated in September that it expects to submit the formal prospectus and listing application to the Shanghai STAR Market between October and December 2025.
Market sources still quote a targeted valuation of up to US$7 billion (≈50 billion RMB).
Once the prospectus is accepted (usually 2–4 rounds of CSRC questions), the actual listing can happen remarkably quickly in a hot sector — sometimes inside 3–6 months. A Q1/Q2 2026 listing is the base case, but a very late-2025 listing is still possible if the regulator fast-tracks it the way they have the tutoring.
What About America?
Meanwhile… America’s Great White Hope Elon Musk is already behind.
Elon Musk promised that the U.S. would lead the humanoid robot race with Tesla Optimus — but the timelines have slipped, and the window has basically closed. By the time Musk’s robot is actually ready for real-world deployment — 2 years from now? 3? — China’s robotics companies will already be deep into mass production, with tens of thousands of units deployed across factories, warehouses, homes, hospitals, and service industries.
And let’s be real — we all already know this:
Tesla will NOT be cost-competitive. Not even close.
China has already hit the sub–$20k price point for serious humanoids. Several G1-derived platforms will likely break below $15k. Meanwhile, Tesla Optimus — if it gets out of prototype limbo — will land somewhere between $20k–$40k+, before customization, localization, or integration costs. It’s the exact same pattern we saw with EVs, solar panels, drones, lithium batteries, telecom gear — the U.S. builds one expensive proof-of-concept; China builds ten factories and ships globally.
So yes, Tesla’s robot may survive inside the U.S., but only through:
• tariffs,
• import bans,
• national-security excuses,
and whatever industrial-policy tool Washington can wield.
It won’t survive on merit. It will survive on protectionism.
But step outside the U.S.?
Why would any ASEAN, Middle Eastern, African, or Latin American country buy a Tesla robot when Unitree, UBTech, XPeng, and others are offering machines that are:
• cheaper,
• and available now — not in 2027,
• generations ahead and more advanced by 2027.
You think Indonesia, Malaysia, Brazil, Mexico, Turkey, or Saudi Arabia is going to pay double the price for a worse robot just to keep Washington happy? You think they’re going to turn down a $12k Unitree or $16k UBTech because Trump tries to bully them into paying for a $35k American robot instead?
The U.S. will absolutely try to pressure, coerce, or outright threaten developing countries into “buying American” — the same way it pressures them on telecom, semiconductors, energy infrastructure, ports, and industrial policy. But this time I don’t think most countries will obey.
They have options now.
By the time the U.S. finally ships its first commercially deployable humanoids in 2–3 years, the rest of the world will already be locked into the Chinese robotic ecosystem — Unitree frames, Chinese actuators, Chinese SDKs, Chinese AI integration, Chinese supply chains.
The EU, Australia, Japan, South Korea, and Taiwan — effectively U.S. satellites — may follow Washington’s orders and switch to American robots. Maybe. If their economies in two years can still afford it.
Everyone else?
Forget it.
Forcing U.S. factories and businesses to buy “American-only” humanoid robots — which will be more expensive and less advanced — will cripple U.S. competitiveness across the board.
If American companies are stuck paying $30k–$40k per unit for less capable Tesla or U.S.-made robots, while factories in China, Malaysia, Indonesia, Brazil, Vietnam, Mexico, Turkey, and everywhere across the Global South are deploying $12k–$18k Chinese robots at scale, the cost gap between U.S. and foreign manufacturing will explode. And it won’t stop at robotics — it will cascade downstream into every single sector that depends on automation:
• logistics
• warehousing
• construction
• agriculture
• textiles
• electronics assembly
• packaging
• even retail, service, and hospitality
If U.S. firms are locked into a high-cost, low-capability robotic ecosystem while the rest of the world uses cheaper, better, faster machines, then every American industry that relies on automation gets structurally handicapped. That’s not just a disadvantage — that’s YUGE and permanent.
So Trump’s protectionism will actually accelerate the decline of U.S. manufacturing competitiveness. Because the battlefield is no longer labor cost — the battlefield is automation cost.
And China will win that fight by orders of magnitude.
This is also why I doubt even America’s closest aligned countries will follow U.S. orders when Washington eventually demands they drop Chinese robots and buy American ones. Unless they’ve developed a death wish for their own industries, they simply can’t afford to sabotage themselves like that — especially when their economies will likely be in even worse shape two years from now.
Except Europe. Europe will probably obey, because their heads are shoved so far up America’s arse they can’t even think straight — and then there’s that incessant, obnoxious demand of theirs: “You must stop be friend with Russia first or we won’t play with you!”
In my opinion China will eventually move toward some form of universal income or redistribution. Once robots replace most human labor, the state will simply “tax” robotic productivity — in whatever form it chooses — and channel that output back to the population. China can do that because the government actually has the authority, the ideology, and the political structure to redistribute.
After all, that’s the logical endgame of communism, isn’t it? A fully automated productive base supporting human welfare.
America? No such luck.
In the U.S., the elites — the top 5%, or really the top 1% — will own the robots. They’ll own the factories, the logistics chains, the land, the means of production, and the automated labor force. Everyone else below them will get… nothing. No jobs, no prospects, no future, nada. Just a growing underclass structurally locked out of the new automated economy, where human labor is obsolete and redundant.
And unlike China, the U.S. government can’t — and won’t — redistribute. It won’t tax robots because it won’t tax the ultra-rich. It won’t implement a universal income. It won’t structurally rebalance anything. The millions displaced by automation will simply be left to rot — not because the technology is bad, but because the political system is incapable of adapting to it.
And if there’s one thing I’ve learned comparing Americans and Chinese: Americans are astonishingly ideologically rigid, stubbornly wedded to outdated principles even when reality punishes them. The Chinese, by contrast, are pragmatic — willing to bend, adapt, and change. That adaptability will matter a lot when robots replace human labor and make capitalism, as we know it, obsolete.
That’s why America is panicking. They know they can’t adapt.
Ian Comments: again, China is ahead in most technologies and they have an unparalleled ability to scale. Once they scale, no one else can compete. You either find a place where you’re ahead and concentrate on staying ahead, or you find a niche. It used to be that China didn’t feel the need to be ahead in everything, but Trump, in his first time, with his sanctions, changed that. The Chinese realized they had to own full stack of everything.
One side effect of this is that Musk isn’t going to get his one trillion dollar payday. It’s based on him hitting targets, including in humanoid robots which he won’t be able to make, because Tesla’s too far behind and lacks the ability to scale.
More on the transition away from labor-distribution capitalism soon.
And great piece by KT. Thanks for letting me post it.